I hate people with lisps, does it show?
I kid, I kid.

Succotash, aka: my new favourite word, is from origin a native American dish.
Its nice and light, easy to make and cheap, win win win!
Oh and it goes great with anything barbequed.

I love saying SUCCOTASH while imagining Shaft's intro-music.
Am I weird?
Probably.

SUCCOTASH!

What you will need is:

* 1 whole can of corn (about 1 1/2 cup)
* 1/2 cup of canned peas (not sweet, regular)
* 1/2 cup of canned mixed beans (lima/fava/kidney/chick)
* 4 mini sweet peppers or one red bell-pepper
* 1 shallot
* a small handful of chopped fresh parsley
* lots of (salted) butter
* 2 TSP(s) of vegetable stock concentrate
* table-salt
* optional: crisped bacon bits (you would sear those first and add the rest in the same order)

Start of by searing the pepper and onion in some butter, 
when they're softened you can throw in all the canned stuff.
The parsley and concentrate you can mix through when everything is heating up, 
and when that's done you can take your pan off the heat and stir a generous amount of butter through. 
Add salt to taste.

Serve with the sausage you schmacked on the BBQ or whatever else tickles your fancy.

SUCCOTASH!

It's sunny!!!!

*GASP*

Translation: BBQ, BBQ, BBQ!

Also: Holy shit I might get an actual skin tone other than "glow in the dark"!

All the spazzing about sun aside, I know it has been a while since I posted any new recipes.
The last two weeks have been insane, and I blame said insanity for the fact that I couldn't find the time to cook let alone write up a post, but I'm back now, in full swing & ready to spice up your barbeque experience.

So chicken skewers & homemade hot-sauce it is!

First I'll write up how to go about making the hot-sauce, grab:

* 4 garlic toes
* 3-4 vine tomatoes
* 1 bell pepper (orange or red for better colouring)
* 4 habaneros

Pre-heat an oven on 200°C/390°F.
Half the tomatoes and quarter/de-seed the bell-pepper.
Put everything in an oven-tray and sprinkle with sea-salt, olive oil and lemon juice.
Let it roast for about an hour, take it out, and when it's cooled off blender/puree until smooth.
I put the sauce in an empty jar I had laying around, it will last (in the fridge) for about 5-7 days.
Hell it can probably last longer but it never makes it past that point in our fridge. 

For the skewers cut up:

* 1-2 chicken breasts in large chunks
* 2 jalapeños (you can use green bell-pepper instead if you want), halved
* 3 mini sweet-peppers, halved
* 3 shallots, halved (just strip off the outer layer..they should have two pieces inside)
* Halloumi (a kind of Greek cheese), 8 large chunks.

Spice the chicken chunks with 1 TBSP of lemon juice, 1 rounded TSP of garlic paste, 1 TSP of onion powder and a generous pinch (or two)of sea-salt.
Skewer all this stuff on, you guessed it, a skewer, and throw it on the BBQ (for about 15min, give or take).

MUNCH.

I drown my stick of tasty in the hot-sauce, but I wouldn't recommend that for everybody..since it's HOT-sauce not mild-happy-yay-tummy-sauce, ya know?

By the way isn't halloumi amazing? It's a cheese that you can grill and won't become a melty miserable pile of burn on the bottom of your barbeque.

Genius stuff.

Okey, you can continue munching now.

Go go gadget piehole!

Since I started this blog that often involves ridiculous amount of spice, the kind that makes you poop magma, I figured at one point or another I would have to do a piece on peppers and their spice levels.
That day has come!

So all you spice-noobs, fire-breathers, and "I can handle lots of spice!!...*hiccup*"-show offs (you know who you are), can adjust my recipes accordingly.

Plus it's always best to build up your heat resistance, as in: don't start of by chugging a bottle of Mega-Death, that won't end well...


Here's the list of popular peppers, from low heat to CRAY-CRAY, with their Scoville rating included (for fun, weeeee!):

* Bell peppers, 0 SR, we all now these fatties... and they're great to stuff or roast. 
* Banana peppers, 0-500 SR, also known as: my eternal order-in pizza disappointment. 
* Pepperoncini, 100-500 SR, these make a great snack when they're pickled, they're small light green/yellow peppers.
* Cubanelle & Anaheim & Basque fryer, +/- 1000 SR, all three are very similar in spice level and good for spice-noobs, they taste similar to bell-peppers and they're large/long usually green peppers. 
* Poblano, 1000-2000 SR, often used in a dish called "Chiles Rellenos" where they are stuffed with cheese and fried.
* Pimento/cherry pepper, 3500 SR, the tiny sweet round red ones restaurants and bars love using as a garnish.
* Jalapeño & Hungarian wax pepper, 2500-8000 SR, the "normal people's" spicy peppers of choice, smoked and dried jalapeño is called Chipotle. 
* Serrano, 10000-23000 SR, the taste is similar to jalapeño... just with an added kick.
* Cayenne & Tabasco pepper, 30000-50000 SR, the first is mostly used as a dried/powdered kitchen spice, and the second is used for the famous "hot"-sauce.
* Bird's eye/Thai chili, 50000-150000 SR, the tiny skinny often red/sometimes green ones you see in Asian stores and Thai/Chinese (Szechuan)/Indonesian/Vietnamese restaurants, usually used in sambal.
* Piri Piri, 50000-175000 SR, mostly used @ Nando's and other Portuguese (inspired) places.
* Habanero & Madame Jeanette & Scotch Bonnet, 150000-350000 SR, my love for habaneros and their flavour buddies is obvious, these all look like yellow/red/orange bonsai bell-peppers. 
* Bhut Jolokia/Ghost pepper, 1500000+ SR, one of the spiciest peppers out there, their taste is similar to habaneros as well. 

So there you go, now you can adjust my recipes to what YOU think you can handle.
But be warned that replacing habaneros with something lower on the Scoville scale is impossible. 
Their flavour is way too unique. 
For that, I would recommend using half a habanero (or less) instead of replacing it. 

Go forth and spice thy füdz with gusto!

I made some spicy beef burgers, so now I'm going to throw something different into the mix:
Sweet  (and cheesy) chicken burgers!

I've never been a fan of chicken burgers. 
Either the patty is too dry, or it's simply too bland, so I was really motivated to make a good one.

And I did (go me!).

Let's start of by making some droolicious patties:

* 1 pound of ground feathery friend (yes chicken)
* 1 egg
* 8 TBSP of breadcrumbs
* 1/2 rounded TSP garlic paste
* 1/4 TSP cayenne powder
* 1/2 rounded TSP honey
* 1/2 TSP table salt

Mix & divide into four equal pieces, roll those into balls and flatten into patties in your palm.
Coat these in a mix of:

* 1/3 cup breadcrumbs
* 1 TBSP flour
* a pinch of salt
* 1/2 TSP cayenne powder

Don't forget to make a dimple with your thumb in the middle of each patty!

These will take 10 minutes to cook on medium/medium-low heat, in a small amount of butter and a splash of olive oil.
Make sure to put a lid on the pan for its entire duration, and flip them on 5 minutes in.
I add 2 slices of brie on top of each patty about two minutes before taking them off the stove, 
to let it lightly melt a bit and to ensure they stick to the burger and not slide off during the nomming.

Grill the buns, because it makes them better.
Cut some green apple in coleslaw sized strips and mix with some baby arugula (or grill some apple slices and simply layer them on top of the arugula, that would be tasty too). 

I also make a quick sauce, out of:

* 2 TBSP creme fraiche
* 2 TBSP apricot jam
* 1 TBSP Dijon mustard

^Stir that until it's a smooth tasty sawz.

Now layer as followed:

BOTTOM BUN
APPLE/ARUGULA MIX
SAWZ (!)
PATTY WITH BRIE
TOP BUN

Aaaaaaaand....

STUFF FACEHOLE!

Is it a burger?
Is it a salad?
Is it a plane?
None of the above my friend, it is a: kinda-sorta-grilled-chicken-sandwich-burger-but-not-really!
Oh yeah, catchy names 'r us.

Lets just start making it & stuff faceholes, because that's what we're really here for, no?

First lets spice up some chicken breasts with:

* 1 1/2 TBSP brown sugar
* 1 TBSP harissa
* 1/2 TSP garlic paste
* a generous pinch of salt
* a little bit of sunflower oil (to make it into a smooth paste)

Sear the breasts in some butter &  sunflower oil on medium, 
as soon as  they're browned on each end put the heat on low and place a lid on the pan,
when they're done let them rest for a little bit and cut them into slices.
You can also flatten the breasts before spicing them if you prefer that over slices on your sandwich.

Grill some ciabatta buns (or another bun in similar style).

Now layer the noms like this:

BOTTOM BUN
MAYO
SALAMI (HUNGARIAN)
BABY SPINACH
RED ONION (THINLY SLICED)
THE CHICKEN (SLICED OR FLATTENED)
MOZZARELLA
ROASTED BELL PEPPER
FRENCH DRESSING
TOP BUN

In future blog posts I will totally write down how to make harissa & French dressing yourself, 
for now store bought will have to do. 
Oh and if you want to roast the bell peppers yourself just throw them on the BBQ until their skin is blackened, let them cool off & the skin should rub right of.

This was the first time I made this sandwich, and as you can see in the picture, I did not slice or flatten the chicken. 
That does not make for easy eating, let me tell you.
But hey, nice picture right? Worth it!

Anyway, eat!
And don't be a hero and try to keep the chicken breast whole, just don't.

NOM 'N STUFF.

Yesterday my fuzz muppet turned 2 years "old".
So I made her a pie!
Stuffed with carrots, broccoli, cauliflower and hotdogs.

She also got a little dinosaur friend, which she didn't want to share her pie with.

It was a pretty big pie, but she ate almost all of it (and dragged it all around the house and even had it outside for a bit).

All in all it was a good day to be a puppy!

Super exciteballs.

If you want to make your doggy a pie, here's how you do it (but this is for a large dog, so adjust if you have a barking hamster).

For the filling you will need:

* 1 large carrot, sliced
* 1 cup of cauliflower
* 1 cup of broccoli
* 4 hotdogs, sliced
* 1 cup of cooked pasta (I used penne)
* 1 1/2 TSP beef stock concentrate
* water, about a shot glass full (what? it's a party)

For the dough:

* 1 egg
* 3/4 cup water
* 1 TSP baking powder
* 1 TSP parmesan, the powdery grated kind
* 1 tsp salt
* 3 1/4 cups flour
* 1/2 cup milk

Steps of assembly:

Pre-heat an oven to 200°C/390°F.
Sear the veggies, penne and hotdogs for a bit and add beef concentrate and water.
Butter a pie tin.
Roll out 1/2 of the dough and place into the tin.
Fill her up with the seared stuffs.
Roll out the other half of the dough and turn that into the pie-lid.
Smear egg on the top and throw some sesame seeds and grated powdery parmesan on there.
Place in the oven for about 30 minutes, or until golden brown.
Let it cool off for about the same amount of time (poke some holes in the top so no steam is stuck in there).
Serve to furry friend.
Watch your dog be happy and try to eat it all in record speed (or hike with it like ours did).

Fun times!

Sponsored by: Stark & Bob the dinosaur.

Pork tenderloins were on sale this week, so I got me one.
This meant that I needed to come up with a pork tenderloin dish,
therefore from my magic hat of food ideas I bring thee: Pork Thaiderloin!

What is Pork Thaiderloin you ask?
Well it's pork tenderloin with some light Thai-ish flavours and rice of course! Derp.

Here is what goes into making it:

* 1 pork tenderloin, rubbed with:
                    * 1/2 TSP sereh powder (dried lemongrass powder)
                    * 1/2 TSP dried fenugreek leaves
                    * 1 lime worth of limejuice (don't squeeze it in your eyeballs, eyeballs hate that stuff)
                    * 1/4 TSP table salt
                    * 1 TSP soy sauce

Sear the pork tenderloin with butter & sunflower oil in a pan on medium-high heat, so each side is browned.
Then put it into an oven tray and place it into a oven pre-heated on 200°C/390°F, for 20-25 minutes.

For the coconut sauce you should grab:

* 1 1/2 sliced Thai chili
* 3 large garlic toes, roughly chopped
* 6 roughly chopped green onions
* 1 stalk of lemongrass, halved so it fits into the pan
* 1 whole can of coconut milk
* 1 whole lime worth of lime juice
* about 4 fresh mint leaves, shredded
* around 8 fresh parsley leaves, also shredded
* a pinch of sea-salt
* 1 TSP Maggi seasoning
* 2 TBSP of chicken broth
* a handfull of chopped up spinach leaves (or 2 handfulls, because spinach is yummy)
* 1 TSP of dried fenugreek leaves

We sear all this in the same pan that we used to sear the tenderloin in, add garlic/lemongrass/green onions/chili first & stir until the garlic pieces are lightly starting to brown, 
after that you can add the rest and let it simmer.
The searing will be done on medium to medium-high, the simmer on low. 

In the pan with rice put some:

* 1 1/2 sliced Thai chili
* a slice of lime
* 1 lemongrass stalk, halved
* 1 TBSP of chopped fresh parsley
* 2 chopped mint leaves
* 1 diced shallot
* 1/2 TSP dried fenugreek leaves
* a generous pinch of sea-salt

And thus you boil your rice with all of the above.

The rice I use is Jasmine, it takes about 15 minutes to cook (and a 3 minute resting period), so I start it 10 minutes after putting the tenderloin in the oven.

When you take out the tenderloin let it rest for a little bit (5-10 mintues), and cut it into slices, thick or thin it's up to you.
Now don't be alarmed when the slices have a light pink center! That means you cooked your pork tenderloin perfectly.
Pork tenderloin is supposed to have a light pink center, and it is totally safe to eat it like that.

Serve as shown on the picture, a spoon of rice topped with the slices covered in the coconut sauce, layering like a boss.

Munch munch, chomp chomp, and all that jazz.

Let yer bellies be full and happy! 

Bonjour, les blog reading peoplez!
As stated in the about section: I'm not big on sweet stuff.
But my husband is.
So every once in a while I have to make something sweet to soothe his craving for tooth decay.
Today that is: French toast, or "Frenchie toast" since he's my Frenchie.

For this you will need:

* Raisin bread
* 3 eggs
* 1 cup of milk
* 1/4 cup of flour
* 2 TSP rum
* 2 TBSP sugar
* 1 TSP vanilla extract
* 1 TBSP orange zest
* 5 TBSP fresh squeezed orange juice (no pulp)

I cut the bread into very thick slices and these slices into rectangles, so you get evenly sided raisiny bread sticks.
The rest of the ingredient list get mixed in a bowl and the raisiny bread sticks will be twirled through the liquid (like tasty starchy ballerinas).
Let them soak for a little bit then fry them in a deep frying pan with a generous layer of oil in it (sunflower or canola), use a spatula to lower them into the oil otherwise they might break in half.
Make sure each side browns evenly and lift them out with a utensil that has holes or something so most of the oil can drip off.

Serve these covered in powdered sugar and schmack some fresh fruit in the mix as well...maybe drown them in maple sugar like my husband does,
he's very Canadian like that.

Bon appétit! (Muahahaha!)

BBQ season is coming, well for some people it never left but I'm not one of those, and that means: STEAK! 
And nothing is better on grilled (rare or blue rare or GTFO, fine, medium rare is passable too) steak than a dollop of homemade garlic butter.

But sometimes I feel like a sweeter, warmer garlic butter..and sometimes I feel like a stronger, sharper garlic butter. So I will provide you all today with my two favourite options! Huzzah!

First up will be the sweet garlic butter of champions, for this one you will need:

* 1 diced shallot
* 1/2 stick of salted butter (+/- 227g)
* 3 TBSP brown sugar
* 10 whole garlic toes
* a bunch of fresh thyme (the leafs violently ripped off the sprigs), about 1 TBSP.
* 1 TBSP crème fraîche
* rum

Sear, in a small sauce pan on medium heat, the onions, garlic and brown sugar.
You can use a little bit of the salted butter to sear them in.
When the onions start to soften up you splash some rum into the pan and let that simmer for about 5 minutes, after that take the pan off the heat and let it cool off.

Put the thyme and the contents of the pan in a food processor, and let the machine do its process-y thing.
When it's all small enough you can add the crème fraîche and butter, mix it all until smooth.

DONE!

Next:

Toxic-green garlic butter! It's green, very damn green.
Ingredients:

* a generous splash of olive oil
* 10 garlic toes
* a splash of milk
* 1/2 stick of salted butter (+/- 227g)
* 2-3 green onions
* a big handful of fresh parsley (I just nonchalantly rip some from the bushel I buy at the market)
* fresh ground black pepper (4-5 turns with the grinder)

There's our mighty kitchen friend the food processor again! I salute you my plastic hard working friend.

Basically you will do the same thing you did before, only this time the milk and butter will be the last to be added.

DONE, again!

Two different butters for two different moods/tastes,
that will each fit many different dinners/lunches/whatever.

Mmmmmmm, butter!

When I'm not craving super saucy pasta, I crave light refreshing pasta..but with the same flavour punch (in your face!). 
And that's what this recipe is all about. 
I love pesto, but I think it is more spring-y when deconstructed (why? BECAUSE). 
And since it is supposed to be spring, yeah sun you heard me, I changed it up a bit (and added some extra ingredients).

The ingredient list is:

* 3 TBSP of chopped fresh parsley
* 1/2 cup of chopped fresh basil
* 2 minced garlic toes
* 1 cup of halved grape tomatoes (squirt some lemon over them)
* 1 generous cup of cubed feta cheese
* a nice handful of shaved parmesan
* 3 TBSP of pine nuts
* 1 small yellow onion or shallot
* pasta of your choice (1-2 person portion)

You can start the pasta at the same time as you start this:
Heat up some butter and olive oil & sear the pine nuts in that mixture (on medium heat).
stir these little mofos the entire time because they have a knack of burning if you don't & do this until they get lightly browned.
Now put the heat on low and add the garlic & onion, wait until they get a bit of colour and then add the tomatoes as well.
When your pasta is close to being done you can add everything else.

Drain the pasta and stir it through the tasty stuff & add a splash of olive oil & a pinch of fresh ground black pepper, maybe a little pinch of salt but I doubt it will really need it with all the cheese in there (taste & see).

That's it, quick easy and good, what else do you want?
If you use chunky pasta & add (when it's  cooled off) a TBSP of crème fraîche & some smoked salmon I bet this would make a good pasta salad.

It's a great side and a great main, so there ya go!

Good eatings!